Sex Objects
About 30 years ago, I was in university. Times were very different, back then. For example, it was possible to write a porn story and sell it to a “men’s magazine” for around $250. I was working on an English / Creative Writing degree and living in student residence. Most of my fellow students were very serious. They all wanted to write profound literature. I wanted to get paid.
I wrote several porn stories and sold them to The Score Group. They were surprisingly supportive editors. More than once, they gave me meaningful feedback on stories. Occasionally, they read a draft and asked me to submit a rewrite. When they published my stuff, they sent me a free copy of the magazine. They were more respectful and supportive of my work than most literary magazines.
Enjoying this weird success, I wrote the following satirical erotic story. When I submitted it to The Score Group, they politely passed on it. I wasn’t surprised.
I had a blog. We all had blogs back then. I posted the story online. It has since grown legs and occasionally shows up in weird corners of the web. On one particular website I used to play on, I was known as “the guy who wrote that toaster story.”
And yes, what you’re about to read is that toaster story. It is “erotic.” By which I mean, “pornographic.” If you can’t handle dirty words and weird sex, stop reading.
Without further ado…
